Once again, I must do a post on Marking the Good. I have posted in this series before, here, and here, and here. The upshot of this series of posts is that all too often we (meaning, me) get too wrapped up in the hectic mill of the chaotic days and even more, trapped in the cycle of cynical. Well, it’s a trap for me at any rate. When you’re parenting a child with special needs and or a tough background, it’s a high risk trap: that cynical thing. So, in order to attempt to stem that tide, now and then I look up and post some good news.
We have just had a very big event in the house, a very big event for our Marta. Even though it’s early in the school year, our high school just had Homecoming (schedules can be wacky things, set the year prior). About two weeks ago I got a phone call from Marta’s teacher and she wanted to let me know that our Marta had been voted as the sophomore class pick for Homecoming Court. (Each class picks and votes in a girl to be part of the hoopla, to represent their class/grade). Well, this year, they picked Marta. Really! And, because I am cynical, I had them check it out to make sure that in no way was the vote tinged with joking or malicious intent. Now, don’t judge me. It’s that protective thing – and you’d do the same thing in my shoes I betcha. Anyhow, it was legit! And so, a few weeks ago, Marta came home, lit up about “select me” to be on Homecoming.
So, we buckled up for the bumpy roller coaster ride!
Why bumpy? Why a roller coaster? Because while this was out of the blue and exciting and kind of amazing…it also meant that we faced two big things: anxiety and ‘feeding the monster.” Anxiety, because Marta is FILLED with anxiety over new things and needs to feel she can control every tiny detail and so on. “Feeding the monster” because she already feels she is something of the school “Princess” and that everyone “selects” her. So…..I wasn’t sure how to offset all that, nor was her teacher. So, we all agreed to just RIDE THE WAVE. (To mix all my metaphors through this whole post. It’s early, I’m not fully caffeinated..leave me be.)
So, we did. There was a lot of crazy. There was a LOT of excitement. There was a lot of anxiety. For two weeks. And last night was the big event. It was Homecoming on the football field at halftime! All the girls primped: the specially made dress (seamstress, fittings, oh my), the friend doing her hair after school, the sparkly shoes, the makeup by her sister, the nerves, the pictures, the buddy to escort her (Sweet boy, super nice friend). Turns out it was POURING about an hour before the game. Nerves worry worry (for everyone!). Then it cleared and just left the hottest steamiest summer night of the year. Which is great, except for the hairdo’s….oh well. Slice of life! Anyhow, Marta carried it off very well. She was a nervous wreck. She was SO excited and so happy but also so shy about being on the field that we could barely get her to look up! Good thing we got some cute pics before!
The great thing about this whole roller coaster surfing tsunami (there, now I’ve really done it..) is that Marta felt like a million bucks. Her sweet wonderful friends at that school made T-shirts that spelled out “We love Marta!” How great is that?
Really, how great is that? Yes, it made me both grin and blink a few tears at the same time. And as I hustled over to the stands as the whole Homecoming court walked out onto the field, I got a spot smack in the center and handed the camera to Tom so I could shout and clap and yell with the best view. I had her Tshirt brigade to my left and my littles by my side and her big sister and Hannah’s friends to my right. All of them, us, standing on the bleachers, shouting and hooting and yelling for Marta. She laughed, lit up, and looked down, again and again.
And I watched her big sis, my eldest daughter, scream for her sister and I blinked. Because they have a complicated, jealous both ways, relationship. And I was so proud of her too. And I watched and grinned with my little boys and my other girls as we all yelled and clapped. And I watched the students genuinely shout and clap for our Marta. And it kind of made me shake my head in wonder.
This complicated tiny girl…she has a way of drawing people to her. And it makes me laugh and ponder. And this one night, she got the amazing chance to be a princess. I usually hate all this kind of high school drama and hoopla. But last night, and this time, I was grateful. Because only here, in this special school, in our little town, would this girl – who came here a few years ago from around the world – be able to soak in and experience this uber-American teen experience. And it made her feel like a million bucks.
Was it a rollercoaster? Oh. Yeah. But, overall, a great ride! And every time we jokingly call her a new (temporary?) nickname…..she grins a megawatt smile. Just like a Princess….