>Blinking in the light: Epiphany

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It’s really real: It’s the Feast of Epiphany today!

Also known as Three Kings Day, and Dia de los Tres Reyes, and Feast of the Magi…it can go on and on. This is a feast that is celebrated in cultures around the world (well, the whole Catholic thing – universal church and all – of course makes that redundant….but still, it’s worth noting the different cultural takes on it).

It makes the old folklore student in me giddy. Sadly, Becca, it does mark the end of the Christmas season. But really, let’s face it, most of you have hauled the tree to the curb (not us, nosiree) and are already checking the boxes on your new snazzy organizer and trying valiantly to ignore the sweet crooning of the cookie jar.
Anyhow, this feast, this year, this week, makes me blink. I have a swirl of thoughts in my recovering brain and I can’t order them well or coherently, but need to process them….so you know what that means: I will blog them and in no logical order. So, lucky you, here goes:

As I mentioned, I am blinking. Blinking back tears, and I’ve been biting back my self-absorbed black foul mood and pity party. It’s not something I asked for, but it was almost more than I could shake and it got hard to even try {maybe due to being sick, but even so…not good, thwacked, knocked down}. It’s been a tough few days, through mostly fault of my own…

And as the star revealed and pointed and lead to Jesus the baby at Epiphany so many years ago, once again, God descends, or condescends, to take pity on me of all people and shine a little light into my foul black selfish world.

And I blink from the glare of His mercy and love.

The klieg lights of this are no mistake. They practically burn, the glare on my wallowing inwardness. But I flutter and squint to look closer and I see: the beauty and glory of the gifts before me.

And I am humbled.

And I bow and bend my prideful selfish neck.
And I cry, again, but this time in sorrow for not seeing well,
but also thanksgiving too at being given those moments to gaze at for a bit,
before I forget again.

And then, because it’s a feast, and God loves abundance and heaping on the good, just so you know He is amazing…..I get an email with good news: they have petitioned for a court date. NO, we do not have one yet, and don’t know when we will know. But it’s forward movement when it had been static. And that is a great bit of news that brings us great happiness. Yes, some might say its a small thing, but to me, it’s more.

And then, because it is a feast and it’s the end of Christmas and God loves abundantly, we get a letter from our girl. It is in rough English, translated. But it is hers and it is to us and it is a priceless. “Please finished my process be fast. I love you. I need you.” It is treasure.

And then, because it is a feast and it is the feast of the Three Kings, we have a third gift too (because God also knows that as a former folklore student I love the classic motif of three gifts, He’s that good…): a picture of our daughter in Addis, with her sweet smile in the jacket we sent. It swamps her and she grins. And so do we.

So, a jumbly day and week. But a clear feast. An epiphany. I see more clearly tonight. Thanks be to God. Happy Feast Day!

5 thoughts on “>Blinking in the light: Epiphany

  1. >”Please finished my process be fast. I love you. I need you.”How sweet is that!?! I am sitting here trying to hold back the tears as I picture your sweet girl and all the older kiddos over there.I pray that your court date will “be fast.” Happy Epiphany, Ryane

  2. >Sigh. How did I know you would point out my end-of-Christmas depression on this date ??? :)love your thoughts. they are literally keeping my heart afloat right now. In my unbelief, I’m pounding “Christmas, Gospel…” over and over in my brain and in my heart. thank you for helping me, and yourself :). Happy feast day :). becca

  3. >We receive such amazing gifts in reflecting upon the gifts brought to baby Jesus. We are reminded He truly is the King of Kings through the gift brought to Him of gold. Reminded to carry each and every prayer to Him as He received the gift of frankincense. And myrhh…a burial spice, He was born to suffer and die for our sins. He suffers along with you in the excruciating wait for your sweet daughter. But, because He is King of Kings, He does hear your prayers. What gifts we all received on that first Epiphany, what gifts we continue to receive again today.Thank you for sharing your thoughts and I pray for peace in your heart as you wait to welcome home the daughter who is waiting for you!!!

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