>Feast Day of St. Joseph!

>Ok, we’ve been doing the novena…now we have the feast!! Yay! 

Its the feast of St. Joseph!!
I love a feast, everything about it..food, fest, fete, remembering, commemorating, celebrating…it’s all the good stuff wrapped up into that one word, isn’t it: FEAST.  Yay.  We Catholics, we love a feast!



Anyhow, you had to see it coming…ya can’t do a novena without then marking the feast day, can  you? Never!  So, last year I also did a post on this great saint, on his feast day.  And since I can’t redo my words or thoughts, and don’t really want to, please go here to get a bit on dear St. Joseph.  As my mind continues to decline and muddle, best to return to my older posts that might be a bit more um, clear…..always!  

Anyhow, last year I wrote all about my adoption links and issues with St. Joseph.  Not HIM actually, but rather others perception of him.  I mean, give the guy some cred! He’s the dad!  Ok…I begin to digress. Go read my post if you have a spark of curiosity about this from an adoptive perspective.  

This year, I just want and need to think about dear St. Joseph as dad.  As father.  As a faithful humble man, who served his God, his family, his child and community.  He didn’t get a lot of attention for it, except for some seriously negative opinions and sniping in the beginning of it all regarding his bride…..  So he didn’t get the kudos, he didn’t get the understanding.  He was and is still misunderstood.  But, and here is the key for me: he didn’t stand up and correct everyone and make sure they understood just what he was doing.  He didn’t. He just went ahead and did the next thing, lived and loved deeply as the dad.  Every day.  In his little town, doing his regular job, no status, no notice, no blog.  Just, day to day, keeping on.  

So, I wonder.  He was  human.  Did he ever want to stand up on one of those tables he made (sturdy, no doubt) and holler at his little townspeople or neighbors, “Hey, I know you have all sorts of ideas about what is going on, but you’re wrong.  I love her.  I love him.  He’s special.  Yeah, God told me it’s ok, it’s right even.  So. Stop judging.  It’s SO much more than you know.”  Ya think???? Ok, probably not.  But, I wonder sometimes.  He’s a saint, but he was human.  He’s a saint not because God made him extra perfect and different than us.  He’s a saint because he was faithful, even when he didn’t understand.  

Saint Joseph and the Infant Christ, c. 1670-85 Giovanni Battista Gaulli

And that, that is like a whack in the head to me.
He was faithful, even when he didn’t – couldn’t – understand.  Because it all didn’t make sense.  But he still accepted.  And gave in to this plan.  And did what he was called to do.  And he didn’t whine and whinge on about it all.  He just did it.  Every day.  Every night.  As long as he was called to do it.  And that, I struggle with that.  Every day lately.  Because I always fall into the narcissistic trap of “it’s all about me.”  I don’t think St. Joseph did that.  Which blows my mind.  

So yeah,  he’s one of my heroes.  He’s still misunderstood.  But, he has much to teach me.  

St. Joseph, pray for us!
Happy Feast Day!

>Novena to St. Joseph, Day 9

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Novena to St. Joseph, Day 9
Final Day!


Ninth Day
PATRON OF A HAPPY DEATH

Saint Joseph, how fitting it was that at the hour of your death Jesus should stand at your bedside with Mary, the sweetness and hope of all mankind. You gave your entire life to the service of Jesus and Mary; at death you enjoyed the consolation of dying in Their loving arms. You accepted death in the spirit of loving submission to the Will of God, and this acceptance crowned your hidden life of virtue. Yours was a merciful judgment, for your foster-Son, for whom you had cared so lovingly, was your Judge, and Mary was your advocate. The verdict of the Judge was a word of encouragement to wait for His coming to Limbo, where He would shower you with the choicest fruits of the Redemption, and an embrace of grateful affection before you breathed forth your soul into eternity.

You looked into eternity and to your everlasting reward with confidence. If our Savior blessed the shepherds, the Magi, Simeon, John the Baptist, and others, because they greeted His presence with devoted hearts for a brief passing hour, how much more did He bless you who have sanctified yourself for so many years in His company and that of His Mother? If Jesus regards every corporal and spiritual work of mercy, performed in behalf of our fellow men out of love for Him, as done to Himself, and promises heaven as a reward, what must have been the extent of His gratitude to you who in the truest sense of the word have received Him, given Him shelter, clothed, nourished, and consoled Him at the sacrifice of your strength and rest, and even your life, with a love which surpassed the love of all fathers.

God really and personally made Himself your debtor. Our Divine Savior paid that debt of gratitude by granting you many graces in your lifetime, especially the grace of growing in love, which is the best and most perfect of all gifts. Thus at the end of your life your heart became filled with love, the fervor and longing of which your frail body could not resist. Your soul followed the triumphant impulse of your love and winged its flight from earth to bear the prophets and patriarchs in Limbo the glad tidings of the advent of the Redeemer.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being able to die in the arms of Jesus and Mary. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace of a happy death. Help me to spend each day in preparation for death. May I, too, accept death in the spirit of resignation to God’s Holy Will, and die, as you did, in the arms of Jesus, strengthened by Holy Viaticum, and in the arms of Mary, with her rosary in my hand and her name on my lips!

*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.

MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>Happy Bday to My Baby Bro!

>Today is my Baby Brother’s Bday!!
Yup.  Let’s see, he’s….um…we are all SO old that I can only remember how old we all are by tallying us up in relation to each other.  Does that make sense?  Maybe not, but it does to me!  So, let’s see, John is 44.  Whoa.  Yeah, and he’s my BABY brother.  Yipes.

Anyhow my wonderful dear funny kind fantastico brilliant brother, John is celebrating his bday today in his brand new locale: Micronesia.

Yup, read that again: Micronesia.

Yup.  Sounds like a state of mind, no?  And, one could argue, with John, that it could apply quite well, somehow, if it was an actual state of mind.  Does that make sense? No? Well, maybe not, but it does to me and I KNOW it does to him too!

John makes me laugh.  He is a gift because he is crazy kind, but he is more so because no one else can make me laugh so very hard.  Til I cry.  Of course, it’s all lies and twisted memories… but they can make my sister and I just howl with laughs.

And today I want to tip my hat to my little dear brother.
Because it’s  his birthday.
Because I love him so much.
Because I love his gorgeous family: his beautiful Parisian wife and his stunning brilliant daughters (my nieces!).
Because he has bravely grabbed a brass ring that flew by and just moved, radically, to Micronesia.
Because he is now a grand poohbah in Micronesia: a muckety-muck in the Attorney General’s office…either the Assistant Attorney General of Micronesia or the de facto Attorney General or the Gofer Attorney General or something of that sort.
But I know it’s a big deal because they sent a cargo container to move his family’s stuff over the ocean to live in Micronesia and work.
He’s an old pro at this, having lived and loved living in Vanuatu years ago.
Because he’s a surf rat and tennis pro at heart, under that pin striped suit.
So I think he will fit right in and be immediately at home.

And I am wishing him a happy happy paradise of a birthday, with foofy tropical drinks, sparkling sun, and great waves to surf today.
Because he’s my baby brother.
And I break into tears whenever I see him (because it’s never often enough).
And then we both laugh.
And I hug him tight.

Happy Happy Birthday John!
We love you!
Catch a wave, surf’s up!

>Novena to St. Joseph, Day 8

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Novena to St. Joseph, Day 8


Eighth Day
FRIEND IN SUFFERING

Saint Joseph, your share of suffering was very great because of your close union with the Divine Savior. All the mysteries of His life were more or less mysteries of suffering. Poverty pressed upon you, and the cross of labor followed you everywhere. Nor were you spared domestic crosses, owing to misunderstandings in regard to the holiest and most cherished of all beings, Jesus and Mary, who were all to you. Keen must have been the suffering caused by the uncertainty regarding Mary’s virginity; by the bestowal of the name of Jesus, which pointed to future misfortune. Deeply painful must have been the prophecy of Simeon, the flight into Egypt, the disappearance of Jesus at the Paschal feast. To these sufferings were surely added interior sorrow at the sight of the sins of your own people.

You bore all this suffering in a truly Christ-like manner, and in this you are our example. No sound of complaint or impatience escaped you — you were, indeed, the silent saint! You submitted to all in the spirit of faith, humility, confidence, and love. You cheerfully bore all in union with and for the Savior and His Mother, knowing well that true love is a crucified love. But God never forsook you in your trials. The trials, too, disappeared and were changed at last into consolation and joy.

It seems that God had purposely intended your life to be filled with suffering as well as consolation to keep before my eyes the truth that my life on earth is but a succession of joys and sorrows, and that I must gratefully accept whatever God sends me, and during the time of consolation prepare for suffering. Teach me to bear my cross in the spirit of faith, of confidence, and of gratitude toward God. In a happy eternity, I shall thank God fervently for the sufferings which He deigned to send me during my pilgrimage on earth, and which after your example I endured with patience and heartfelt love for Jesus and Mary.

You were truly the martyr of the hidden life. This was God’s Will, for the holier a person is, the more he is tried for the love and glory of God. If suffering is the flowering of God’s grace in a soul and the triumph of the soul’s love for God, being the greatest of saints after Mary, you suffered more than any of the martyrs.

Because you have experienced the sufferings of this valley of tears, you are most kind and sympathetic toward those in need. Down through the ages souls have turned to you in distress and have always found you a faithful friend in suffering. You have graciously heard their prayers in their needs even though it demanded a miracle. Having been so intimately united with Jesus and Mary in life, your intercession with Them is most powerful.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being able to suffer for Jesus and Mary. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to bear my suffering patiently for love of Jesus and Mary. Grant that I may unite the sufferings, works and disappointments of life with the sacrifice of Jesus in the Mass, and share like you in Mary’s spirit of sacrifice.




*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>St. Joseph Novena, Day 7

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St. Joseph Novena, Day 7

Etching, Flight into Egypt, by Sebastien Bourdon

Seventh Day
PATRON OF WORKERS

Saint Joseph, you devoted your time at Nazareth to the work of a carpenter. It was the Will of God that you and your foster-Son should spend your days together in manual labor. What a beautiful example you set for the working classes!

It was especially for the poor, who compose the greater part of mankind, that Jesus came upon earth, for in the synagogue of Nazareth, He read the words of Isaiah and referred them to Himself:  “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because He has anointed Me to bring good news to the poor…” (Luke 4:18). It was God’s Will that you should be occupied with work common to poor people, that in this way Jesus Himself might ennoble it by inheriting it from you, His foster-father, and by freely embracing it. Thus our Lord teaches us that for the humbler class of workmen, He has in store His richest graces, provided they live content in the place God’s Providence has assigned them, and remain poor in spirit for He said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matt. 5:3).

The kind of work to which you devoted your time in the workshop of Nazareth offered you many occasions of practicing humility. You were privileged to see each day the example of humility which Jesus practiced — a virtue most pleasing to Him. He chose for His earthly surroundings not the courts of princes nor the halls of the learned, but a little workshop of Nazareth. Here you shared for many years the humble and hidden toiling of the God-Man. What a touching example for the worker of today!

While your hands were occupied with manual work, your mind was turned to God in prayer. From the Divine Master, who worked along with you, you learned to work in the presence of God in the spirit of prayer, for as He worked He adored His Father and recommended the welfare of the world to Him, Jesus also instructed you in the wonderful truths of grace and virtue, for you were in close contact with Him who said of Himself, “I am the Way and the Truth and the Life.”

As you were working at your trade, you were reminded of the greatness and majesty of God, who, as a most wise Architect, formed this vast universe with wonderful skill and limitless power.

The light of divine faith that filled your mind, did not grow dim when you saw Jesus working as a carpenter. You firmly believed that the saintly Youth working beside you was truly God’s own Son.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being able to work side by side with Jesus in the carpenter shop of Nazareth. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to respect the dignity of labor and ever to be content with the position in life, however lowly, in which it may please Divine Providence to place me. Teach me to work for God and with God in the spirit of humility and prayer, as you did, so that I may offer my toil in union with the sacrifice of Jesus in the Mass as a reparation for my sins, and gain rich merit for heaven.

 


*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.

MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>St. Joseph Novena, Day 6

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St. Joseph Novena, Day 6


Sixth Day
PATRON OF FAMILIES

Saint Joseph, I venerate you as the gentle head of the Holy Family. The Holy Family was the scene of your life’s work in its origin, in its guidance, in its protection, in your labor for Jesus and Mary, and even in your death in their arms. You lived, moved, and acted in the loving company of Jesus and Mary. The inspired writer describes your life at Nazareth in only a few words: “And (Jesus) went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was subject to them” (Luke, 2:51). Yet these words tell of your high vocation here on earth, and the abundance of graces which filled your soul during those years spent in Nazareth.

Your family life at Nazareth was all radiant with the light of divine charity. There was an intimate union of heart and mind among the members of your Holy Family. There could not have been a closer bond than that uniting you to Jesus, your foster-Son and to Mary, your most loving wife. Jesus chose to fulfill toward you, His foster-father, all the duties of a faithful son, showing you every mark of honor and affection due to a parent. And Mary showed you all the signs of respect and love of a devoted wife. You responded to this love and veneration from Jesus and Mary  with feelings of deepest love and respect. You had for Jesus a true fatherly love, enkindled and kept aglow in your heart by the Holy Spirit. And you could not cease to admire the workings of grace in Mary’s soul, and this admiration caused the holy love which you had consecrated to her on the day of your wedding grow stronger every day.

God has made you a heavenly patron of family life because you sanctified yourself as head of the Holy Family and thus by your beautiful example sanctified family life. How peacefully and happily the Holy Family rested under the care of your fatherly rule, even in the midst of trials. You were the protector, counselor, and consolation of the Holy Family in every need. And just as you were the model of piety, so you gave us by your zeal, your earnestness and devout trust in God’s providence, and especially by your love, the example of labor according to the Will of God. You cherished all the experiences common to family life and the sacred memories of the life, sufferings, and joys in the company of Jesus and Mary. Therefore the family is dear to you as the work of God, and it is of the highest importance in your eyes to promote the honor of God and the well-being of man. In your loving fatherliness and unfailing intercession you are the patron and intercessor of families, and you deserve a place in every home.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of living in the Holy Family and being its head. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain God’s blessing upon my own family. Make our home the kingdom of Jesus and Mary — a kingdom of peace, of joy, and love.

I also pray for all Christian families. Your help is needed in our day when God’s enemy has directed his attack against the family in order to desecrate and destroy it. In the face of these evils, as patron of families, be pleased to help; and as of old, you arose to save the Child and His Mother, so today arise to protect the sanctity of the home. Make our homes sanctuaries of prayer, of love, of patient sacrifice, and of work. May they be modeled after your own at Nazareth. Remain with us with Jesus and Mary, so that by your help we may obey the commandments of God and of the Church; receive the holy sacraments of God and of the Church; live a life of prayer; and foster religious instruction in our homes. Grant that we may be reunited in God’s Kingdom and eternally live in the company of the Holy Family in heaven.


Novena to 
St. Joseph

*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>St. Joseph Novena, Day 5

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St. Joseph Novena, Day 5
St. Joseph Photo in Buffalo NY, by Geraldine Liguidano


Fifth Day
PATRON OF THE CHURCH

Saint Joseph, God has appointed you patron of the Catholic Church because you were the head of the Holy Family, the starting-point of the Church. You were the father, protector, guide and support of the Holy Family. For that reason you belong in a particular way to the Church, which was the purpose of the Holy Family’s existence.

I believe that the Church is the family of God on earth. Its government is represented in priestly authority which consists above all in its power over the true Body of Christ, really present in the Blessed Sacrament of the Altar, thus continuing Christ’s life in the Church. From this power, too, comes authority over the Mystical Body of Christ, the members of the Church — the power to teach and govern souls, to reconcile them with God, to bless them, and to pray for them.

You have a special relationship to the priesthood because you possessed a wonderful power over our Savior Himself. Your life and office were of a priestly function and are especially connected with the Blessed Sacrament. To some extent you were the means of bringing the Redeemer to us — as it is the priest’s function to bring Him to us in the Mass — for you reared Jesus, supported, nourished, protected and sheltered Him. You were prefigured by the patriarch Joseph, who kept supplies of wheat for his people. But how much greater than he were you! Joseph of old gave the Egyptians mere bread for their bodies. You nourished, and with the most tender care, preserved for the Church Him who is the Bread of Heaven and who gives eternal life in Holy Communion.

God has appointed you patron of the Church because the glorious title of patriarch also falls by special right to you. The patriarchs were the heads of families of the Chosen People, and theirs was the honor to prepare for the Savior’s incarnation. You belonged to this line of patriarchs, for you were one of the last descendants of the family of David and one of the nearest forebears of Christ according to the flesh. As husband of Mary, the Mother of God, and as the foster-father of the Savior, you were directly connected with Christ. Your vocation was especially concerned with the Person of Jesus; your entire activity centered about Him. You are, therefore, the closing of the Old Testament and the beginning of the New, which took its rise with the Holy Family of Nazareth. Because the New Testament surpasses the Old in every respect, you are the patriarch of patriarchs, the most venerable, exalted, and amiable of all the patriarchs.

Through Mary, the Church received Christ, and therefore the Church is indebted to her. But the Church owes her debt of gratitude and veneration to you also, for you were the chosen one who enabled Christ to enter into the world according to the laws of order and fitness. It was by you that the patriarchs and the prophets and the faithful reaped the fruit of God’s promise. Alone among them all, you saw with your own eyes and possessed the Redeemer promised to the rest of men.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being the Patron of the Church. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to live always as a worthy member of this Church, so that through it I may save my soul. Bless the priests, the religious, and the laity of the Catholic Church, that they may ever grow in God’s love and faithfulness in His service. Protect the Church from the evils of our day and from the persecution of her enemies. Through your powerful intercession may the church successfully accomplish its mission in this world — the glory of God and the salvation of souls!


*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>Novena to St. Joseph, Day 4

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Novena to St. Joseph, Day 4
El Greco (I love El Greco’s paintings)


Fourth Day
FAITHFUL SERVANT

Saint Joseph, you lived for one purpose — to be the personal servant of Jesus Christ, the Word made flesh.Your noble birth and ancestry, the graces and gifts, so generously poured out on you by God — all this was yours to serve our Lord better. Every thought, word, and action of yours was a homage to the love and glory of the Incarnate Word. You fulfilled most faithfully the role of a good and faithful servant who cared for the House of God.

How perfect was your obedience! Your position in the Holy Family obliged you to command, but besides being the foster-father of Jesus, you were also His disciple. For almost thirty years, you watched the God-Man display a simple and prompt obedience, and you grew to love and practice it very perfectly yourself. Without exception you submitted to God, to the civil rulers, and to the voice of your conscience.

When God sent an angel to tell you to care for Mary, you obeyed in spite of the mystery which surrounded her motherhood. When you were told to flee into Egypt under painful conditions, you obeyed without the slightest word of complaint. When God advised you in a dream to return to Nazareth, you obeyed. In every situation your obedience was as simple as your faith, as humble as your heart, as prompt as your love. It neglected nothing; it took in every command.

You had the virtue of perfect devotednesswhich marks a good servant. Every moment of your life was consecrated to the service of our Lord: sleep, rest, work, pain. Faithful to your duties, you sacrificed everything unselfishly, even cheerfully. You would have sacrificed even the happiness of being with Mary. The rest and quiet of Nazareth was sacrificed at the call of duty. Your entire life was one generous giving, even to the point of being ready to die in proof of your love for Jesus and Mary. With true unselfish devotedness you worked without praise or reward.

But God wanted you to be in a certain sense a cooperator in the Redemption of the worldHe confided to you the care of nourishing and defending the Divine Child. He wanted you to be poor and to suffer because He destined you to be the foster-father of His Son, who came into the world to save men by His sufferings and death, and you were to share in His suffering. In all of these important tasks, the Heavenly Father always found you a faithful servant!

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being God’s faithful servant. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to be a faithful servant of God as you were. Help me to share, as you did, the perfect obedience of Jesus, who came not to do His Will, but the Will of His Father; to trust in the Providence of God, knowing that if I do His Will, He will provide for all my needs of soul and body; to be calm in my trials and to leave it to our Lord to free me from them when it pleases Him to do so. And help me to imitate your generosity, for there can be no greater reward here on earth than the joy and honor of being a faithful servant of God.



*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>Novena to St. Joseph, Day 3

>

Novena to St. Joseph, Day 3


Third Day
MAN CHOSEN BY THE BLESSED TRINITY

Saint Joseph, you were the man chosen by God the FatherHe selected you to be His representative on earth, hence He granted you all the graces and blessings you needed to be His worthy representative.

You were the man chosen by God the Son. Desirous of a worthy foster-father, He added His own riches and gifts, and above all, His love. The true measure of your sanctity is to be judged by your imitation of Jesus. You were entirely consecrated to Jesus, working always near Him, offering Him your virtues, your work, your sufferings, your very life. Jesus lived in you perfectly so that you were transformed into Him. In this lies your special glory, and the keynote of your sanctity. Hence, after Mary, you are the holiest of the saints.

You were chosen by the Holy Spirit. He is the mutual Love of the Father and the Son — the heart of the Holy Trinity. In His wisdom He draws forth all creatures from nothing, guides them to their end in showing them their destiny and giving them the means to reach it. Every vocation and every fulfillment of a vocation proceeds from the Holy Spirit. As a foster-father of Jesus and head of the Holy Family, you had an exalted and most responsible vocation — to open the way for the redemption of the world and to prepare for it by the education and guidance of the youth of the God-Man. In this work you cooperated as the instrument of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit was the guide; you obeyed and carried out the works. How perfectly you obeyed the guidance of the God of Love!

The words of the Old Testament which Pharaoh spoke concerning Joseph of Egypt can well be applied to you: “Can we find such another man, that is full of the spirit of God, or a wise man like to him?” (Gen. 41:38). No less is your share in the divine work of God than was that of Egypt. You now reign with your foster-Son and see reflected in the mirror of God’s Wisdom the Divine Will and what is of benefit to our souls.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for having made you the man specially chosen by Him. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to imitate your virtues so that I too may be pleasing to the Heart of God. Help me to give myself entirely to His service and to the accomplishment of His Holy Will, that one day I may reach heaven and be eternally united to God as you are.



*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.

MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>Detours

>This is a post about detours.

***

And apropos of this theme, I have a detour before I start blathering on about detours:

As I’ve been stewing about this post, this subject…a great lot of um, stuff (this is a G rated blog, right? right) has hit the fan in the Ethiopian adoption world. And I have a fair bit of thoughts about it rumbling through my brain…but those are for another post(s). {New requirements, across the board, for all families to travel twice – complicated and difficult and possibly good in the long run but a huge hurdle in the short for so many} For the moment, I offer my condolences and my ears to hear and heart to hurt for all of the children and families affected – for the cold slap in the face of worry that this news brings. But again, it’s too easy to slide into the tempest of this news and start fretting aloud and repeating everyone else’s words, and those who are in it, right now. And I’m not. I don’t own those words. So I won’t go there, not today. Maybe another day, ya never know! But I will probably also go off on a tangent or two…as I said, this just opens up so much fodder for pondering and processing, for me anyhow, which means, of course, for you!

***
Back to current post:
***

Anyhooo. As I said, I’ve been stewing about detours. It’s hard to write all this because it’s close. It carves right under that spot in your chest, right in tight to your heart and lungs. So if you cut too close you kind of gasp and can’t breath, and you hold your breath as you talk closer to it, so that you can be really careful. Because you need to protect your own heart and also the hearts and breathing of the ones you love. I don’t know, it’s hard to make this make sense. I know I’m not making sense, and yet, this disclaimer must be put out first. Because its a raw spot. But it’s also a spot that needs to toughen up, heal, move forward and that only happens by bringing it out to the light and looking at it, and thus, this post.

Right. Now that most have clicked away out of confusion and impatience, it’s just us friends. Hey there.

So. A few times in my life, parenting life mostly, I have had some detours.
Scratch that: Ok, any life, my life, yours, we all have detours because no life goes as we initially plan it. Then it would be dull and boring and unsatisfying.

But I’m talking about the hard turn detours. The ones that have you ending up somewhere you never dreamed, parenting wise. Others have written beautifully about all this. I don’t seem to be able to (again, hence this post). Probably the best known piece on this is here, known as “Welcome to Holland.”

So, I’ve been to Holland, figuratively speaking. And you know, while the place has it has it’s beauties, it’s still a tough landing. And we have found ourselves detoured there once again, recently. And you know, this “Holland” is a complicated place. And like all control freaks (me), that detour thing?…..it makes you (ok, me) want to kick and fuss and whine.

Because I don’t like detours….because they weren’t in “THE PLAN.” And that PLAN, well, we are, were, supposed to follow it. I mean, I had it all mapped out, you know? Knew where the bumps were, the turns, the scenic spots. Knew the time to get to our destination, and the best roads to follow. Heck, had even traveled it once or twice before. And when you are sent on a detour, even to somewhere with it’s own intrinsic beauty, well, we control freaks kind of um, freak out a bit. Maybe we get frantic, or very quiet, or very deeply indigo blue. Maybe we stop trusting. Maybe we question if we ever did. Or do. Maybe we stop looking out, because the view has changed. And we get stuck with the rut of “but.” As in, “But it was supposed to be Italy, not Holland.” Or, “But, it was supposed to be in the PLAN, page 42.”
And maybe it takes some time to realize that those detours are for us.
Those detours are for us.
Those detours are given to us by God himself.
Not as a punishment (because they are challenging, sometimes very hard, so it is easy to mistake them as such).
But as a gift.
A gift.
To call us back to Him.
To love Him better, right now.
To call us out of ourselves.

To save us from ourselves.
Those detours are not to deprive us/me of Italy.
That detour, this Holland, is to break our/my grasp on my own deadly vision: Us. Ok, me.
Finally, I realize that my struggle with this detour is me.
Of course.
Ever.
It has been ever so painfully shown to me (thank you Fr. Luke, ouch) that struggle is in my unwillingness to look….beyond my own miserable me. My plan. My day. My feelings and desires and needs. Those very things are what drag me into the indigo abyss. And that is not where I wanted to be or choose to stay.
And I forgot my prayer.
I – not so long ago – literally prayed this: “Save me from myself, Oh God, send me a child, the one you choose.”
I forgot.
And He did what I asked.
Eight times.
Oh, dear, how could I forget that prayer?

This detour is for us. For me.
It all just IS for the child — They haven’t detoured. I have.
And they are waiting, pretty patiently for the most part, for us/me to step off the plane and start walking with them.
Really. Not grudgingly. Not counting the steps.
They are waiting to show me Holland. Again. Or – their Italia.

This blog, this post, helped me realize that it’s ok to get frustrated with the detours.
But it’s also ok to say the heck with it all, and we can make our own “Italy” right here.
Really?
Whoa.
I knew that, right?
Yeah, on the good days.
But I keep forgetting.

But, you know what?
I want to go to Italy.
I love Italy!
And who says we have to be stuck anywhere…..because detours are all about seeing new places with new eyes.
And I want to create some Viva Italia, starting now.

>Novena to St. Joseph, Day 2

>

Novena to St. Joseph, Day 2

Second Day
VIRGINAL HUSBAND OF MARY

Saint Joseph, I honor you as the true husband of Mary. Scripture says: “Jacob begot Joseph, the husband of Mary, and of her was born Jesus who is called Christ” (Matt. 1:16). Your marriage to Mary was a sacred contract by which you and Mary gave yourselves to each other. Mary really belonged to you with all she was and had. You had a right to her love and obedience; and no other person so won her esteem, obedience, and love.

You were also the protector and witness of Mary’s virginityBy your marriage you gave to each other your virginity, and also the mutual right over it — a right to safeguard the other’s virtue. This mutual virginity also belonged to the divine plan of the Incarnation, for God sent His angel to assure you that motherhood and virginity in Mary could be united.

This union of marriage not only brought you into daily familiar association with Mary, the loveliest of God’s creatures, but also enabled you to share with her a mutual exchange of spiritual goodsAnd Mary found her edification in your calm, humble, and deep virtue, purity, and sanctity. What a great honor comes to you from this close union with her whom the Son of God calls Mother and whom He declared the Queen of heaven and earth! Whatever Mary had belonged by right to you also, and this included her Son, even though He had been given to her by God in a wonderful way. Jesus belonged to you as His legal father. Your marriage was the way which God chose to have Jesus introduced into the world, a great divine mystery from which all benefits have come to us.

God the Son confided the guardianship and the support of His Immaculate Mother to your care. Mary’s life was that of the Mother of the Savior, who did not come upon earth to enjoy honors and pleasures, but to redeem the world by hard work, suffering, and the cross. You were the faithful companion, support, and comforter of the Mother of Sorrows. How loyal you were to her in poverty, journeying, work, and pain. Your love for Mary was based upon your esteem for her as Mother of God. After God and the Divine Child, you loved no one as much as her. Mary responded to this love. She submitted to your guidance with naturalness and easy grace and childlike confidence. The Holy Spirit Himself was the bond of the great love which united your hearts.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being the virginal husband of Mary. As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to love Jesus with all my heart, as you did, and  love Mary with some of the tenderness and loyalty with which you loved her.



*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen

>Novena to St. Joseph, Begins today, Day 1

>

OK, so we are in the middle of the desert.  The lenten desert that is.  And I am feeling that dry parched stumbling sense of “when are we gonna find our way through this?”  That’s lent all right,  and right on cue.

I even chaperoned the girls on an amazing great rich retreat last weekend, but still…..it’s lent, it’s hard, it’s supposed to be.  I think we are supposed to be stumbling and gasping for help a bit.  Because we need to remember that we can’t do this, ANY of this…this life mom parenting living loving persevering STUFF…..on our own.

To that end, my son who is living large in Italy (though he’s supposed to be hitting the books hard…ahem) has sent me a reminder and a link to this novena.  The Novena to St. Joseph.  He asked me if I wanted to join him in praying this novena.  It begins today.  I said  yes.

You know what that means: I will put it up on blog. Every day.
And  you too, if you are interested can pray along.  Follow the bouncing ball…..(remember that? did I just date myself again???)  


But, really, it’s to St. Joseph, patron of families, workers, earthly father to Christ.  He gets it.  He got old, tired, worked hard, loved much and faithfully, endured adversity, followed God’s will, even hauling his young new family to Egypt when prompted to go…saving them, obediently, in blind faith.  So I think he’s a good one to turn to now, in the desert.  He’s been there, literally (uh, Egypt, Israel, remember) and figuratively. Plus, he’s a dad.  So, he’ll listen kindly with an open heart to our worries and then pray on our behalf to his son.  And, as we know the  prayers of a just man mean much, and as we (Ok, I) beg folks all the time for prayers for this or that….why not hit up someone who ‘get’s it” and is close to Christ: his earthly dad.

I mean, this is what I love about novenas…..don’t your kids come to you get you to petition Dad for things? “Please mom, talk to him about letting me go to that dance.  Mom, can you talk to Dad?  I really want to go to that school, you know……”  Well, my kids do it. I do it still.  A novena is the same deal.  It’s asking folks for prayers for  you, for petition about your concerns.  But in a much more expanded way than our constricting earthly selves.  I think it’s beautiful…and I’m grateful for them.

So, without further ado.  (You’re welcome.) Here it is.

Day One. Novena to St Joseph.

Day One
FOSTER-FATHER OF JESUS

Saint Joseph, you were privileged to share in the mystery of the Incarnation as the foster-father of Jesus.Mary alone was directly connected with the fulfillment of the mystery, in that she gave her consent to Christ’s conception and allowed the Holy Spirit to form the sacred humanity of Jesus from her blood. You had a part in this mystery in an indirect manner, by fulfilling the condition necessary for the Incarnation — the protection of Mary’s virginity before and during your married life with her. You made the virginal marriage possible, and this was a part of God’s plan, foreseen, willed, and decreed from all eternity.
In a more direct manner you shared in the support, upbringing, and protection of the Divine Child as His foster-father. For this purpose the Heavenly Father gave you a genuine heart of a father — a heart full of love and self-sacrifice. With the toil of your hands you were obliged to offer protection to the Divine Child, to procure for Him food, clothing, and a home. You were truly the saint of the holy childhood of Jesus — the living created providence which watched over the Christ-Child.
When Herod sought the Child to put Him to death, the Heavenly Father sent an angel but only as a messenger, giving orders for the flight; the rest He left entirely in your hands. It was that fatherly love which was the only refuge that received and protected the Divine Child. Your fatherly love carried Him through the desert into Egypt until all enemies were removed. Then on your arms the Child returned to Nazareth to be nourished and provided for during many years by the labor of your hands. Whatever a human son owes to a human father for all the benefits of his up-bringing and support, Jesus owed to you, because you were to Him a foster-father, teacher, and protector.
You served the Divine Child with a singular love. God gave you a heart filled with heavenly, supernatural love — a love far deeper and more powerful than any natural father’s love could be.

You served the Divine Child with great unselfishness, without any regard to self-interest, but not without sacrifices. You did not toil for yourself, but you seemed to be an instrument intended for the benefit of others, to be put aside as soon as it had done its word, for you disappeared from the scene once the childhood of Jesus had passed.

You were the shadow of the Heavenly Father not only as the earthly representative of the authority of the Father, but also by means of your fatherhood — which only appeared to be natural — you were to hide for a while the divinity of Jesus. What a wonderfully sublime and divine vocation was yours — the loving Child which you carried in your arms, and loved and served so faithfully, had God in Heaven as Father and was Himself God!

Yours is a very special rank among the saints of the Kingdom of God, because you were so much a part of the very life of the Word of God made Man. In your house at Nazareth and under your care the redemption of mankind was prepared. What you accomplished, you did for us. You are not only a powerful and great saint in the Kingdom of God, but a benefactor of the whole of Christendom and mankind. Your rank in the Kingdom of God, surpassing far in dignity and honor of all the angels, deserves our very special veneration, love, and gratitude.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of having been chosen by God to be the foster-father of His Divine Son. As a token of your own gratitude to God for this your greatest privilege, obtain for me the grace of a very devoted love for Jesus Christ, my God and my Savior. Help me to serve Him with some of the self-sacrificing love and devotion which you had while on this earth with Him. Grant that through your intercession with Jesus, your foster-Son, I may reach the degree of holiness God has destined for me, and save my soul.




*NOVENA PRAYER
*(prayer to be said at the end of each day’s devotion)

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you. You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants. Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession. I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will. Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.


MEMORARERemember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief. Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you. Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen




>The Road to Connections

>I’m hitting the road today, with a car full of teen girls from our little parochial school.  I’m taking the eighth graders and Marta (I hope) up to Youth 2000, a Catholic youth retreat.  I’m the chaperone (for the girls anyhow)!  No, it’s not in New York, they hold these around the country (possibly in spots around the world, not sure).  But the video below is a good glimpse of what we’ll be doing this weekend…


I’ve been to a few of these and also helped put one on at our local high school a few  years ago and I will say, they are awesome.  They get the kids fired up.  Even better, the kids get to drop their guard and connect.  
CONNECT.  
They connect to their friends, but also to their faith, their prayer, their deepest truest heart.  


 These Youth 2000 Retreats always have a great band, great music, great talks, great kids and best of all, the great wonderful compelling Fransiscan Friars of the Renewal.  I love these guys!  They are so full of joy and fun and life and are young and happening and folks (ok, me) tend to want to follow them around like puppies.  Compelling.  


It should be a wonderful, intense, exhausting, fun weekend.  I am looking forward to it!  So, please keep the girls and I in your prayers that we have a wonderful weekend, rich in prayer and connections…to each other and to our faith.   

>Is that your final answer?

>

Yes.

>Great minds work together…

>….and can accomplish great things.

To that end, I am giving a shout out to the whole adoption community: the families, the parents, the kids (young or grown), the pros, the educators….the ones in the trenches.

photo (c) Writers in the Schools 2007-2010

Brainstorming.
That’s what’s happening around here.
We want your ideas, requests, wishes…..what do you need, what do you want, what do you wish you could find when you’re talking about resources AFTER you come home with your child?

My good friend and fabulous social worker is frustrated with the lack of extended post adoption resources around here, and, really, in general. Not only for the immediate post adoption needs…but the ones that are harder to pin down sometimes, the long term ones too. Because that cute little baby or toddler is gonna grow up into a middle schooler, a preteen, ack, a teen, and eventually an adult!

Please don’t slough this off just on the placing agencies…think a minute. Goodness, we all know that post placement visits are mandatory and most all agencies are available for those calls of sheer confusion or just needing to check in…or, the ones of desperation. However, most of us don’t make use of that built in resource. If you’re like me, you tend to scavenge around on your own, and then wonder why you keep bumping into walls. I do, anyhow, mostly. And I’m kind of crazy resourceful, in general. So when I start beating the bushes and running into walls…you know there is a lack, a need, a gaping hole that needs to be filled.

Post Adoption Resources. It’s a hole.

Yes, there are books. That’s always a good start.
But I’m talking about someone, a real person or people, who you can connect with on the other end of the line or face to face real life and talk to about any or all questions you might have. Because it’s easy to think that most issues or concerns fit into a tidy slot. But you know, when you’re talking about families and kids, and specifically adoption issues of some kind…often they don’t.
There is no one size fits all.

So, my terrific caring social worker, smart as a whip gal that she is….she wants to build up the resources. She really understands this stuff and it is her passion. As for me, I’m just glad she’s got this idea tumbling around and the determination to make it happen.

So, let’s help.
Please, in the comment box or my email or any which way you know how to reach me, send me your ideas, your wishes, your wants, your “gee why can’t I find this” feelings on what would be great to be able to access in post adoption resources.
It can be anything that strikes you, that’s what brainstorming is all about! Newbie parents, babies, toddlers, but also older kids, older child adoptions, school issues, cultural, medical, etc etc…..throw it out. Our list has already begun, and we want to grow it wide to see if that need can be met and how.

Here are few we already have on the list: Post Adoption Services/Resources:
therapy
tutoring
esl, private/group
mentoring (kid, mom, parents, family)
cultural connections, links
groups
advisor to IEP’s and spec ed
Referral resources for all of the above as well as providing it, plus referral for medical, theraputic, educational, legal, assessment, translation professionals as well.

Any other ideas?
Any other wishes?
Like what you see/what’s on the list now?
Here’s your chance, tell us!<br
Even if it’s just to say “yeah, that tutoring thing-I’ve been looking for that.” Please tell us that too; then we can know what is most wanted too. />
Please, leave a comment, let us know, what you would like to see, locally, nationally, in person or online.
Help us start to fill a hole.

That way we can keep on helping each other.
That’s really why we are all here anyhow, right?

>Tripping

>

Falling. Stumbling. Slipping. Stubbing.
Tripping.
We all fall down.

I fall down.

It’s why I grasp onto the prayer of the Stations of the Cross.
Because Christ falls, not once, but THREE times, as he carries his cross. And today is Friday and so I am thinking about this, tis the season….yeah, for falling.

Thus, as I fall, every darn day…it helps me. It helps me to pray the stations, to read and contemplate his exhaustion, how very hard it was to take the next step, any step, to just hold.
And he needed help…or, more precisely, he ALLOWED help.

Now he allowed help in order to let us participate, in order to show that through weakness we can be strong, together. He allowed help because that cross was SO. VERY. HEAVY….from us.
Perhaps if he hadn’t fallen, and allowed help to get up and keep going…just contemplating this walk would break us too. It would break me, I know. As it is, just contemplating it is heavy on my heart, every time.

And yet, it’s also such a help. Because I fall.
I’m falling. I fall again and again, ever, in carrying this measly hollow reed of a cross that I’ve been given.
I throw it down, tired and fed up. I gripe, I moan, I whine. As if that will help. It doesn’t. It only annoys everyone, not the least of which is myself (I offer a blanket apology to all my long suffering friends and family).

It’s OH so easy to compare crosses. Such a trap.
I do, though. All the time. And then I want to skulk away, knowing my cross is a twig, a hollow twig. It is filled with sweet kisses and belly hugs, soft sighs in the morning, and inside jokes.
Even so, I know this but some days I drop it, again and again. Because too often I focus on the struggles the fussing the attitudes the physical tiredness. But that mere twig, woven from eight (ok, nine) special souls in my care, grows in my selfish tired heart and hands into a giant redwood.
On those days, I strain to see through the gloaming…the shadows are long.
But I have blinded my own self. I am only looking at the hard, the tired…me.

Then another blessed Lenten Friday arrives, again, and I kneel to pray the stations.
I sing, off key, the Stabat Mater, in between the Stations.
And I blink to keep the tears back as my eyes, my heart, comes into focus again.
My twiggy cross is filled with sweet kisses and belly hugs, soft sighs in the morning, and inside jokes.
It is MY cross.
It is MY joy.

I fell down.
Tripped.
With help, and new eyes again, I get up.
It’s Friday…time for the Stations…again.

>Almost Wordless Wednesday

>

Ya know..I get this look a lot…..

>Roll on up!

>Ok, I don’t usually do this, but I am taking a break from my usual blather to point you in the direction of a happy fun worthwhile thing.  This is a win-win deal all the way around and so, I’m gonna do you a big favor and shout it out. 

You see, one of my friends, the amazing Adrienne Parks (and another post will have to do her and her program justice, this one is focused), is doing a fundraiser for her adoption from Bulgaria.  Now, I know, I know, we are all fundraising weary.  It’s a weary time of year: the winter blues, seasonal affective disorder, spring fever, Haiti needs, and so on.  

However, do yourself a favor and head over to her blog and check out her stuff.  Because after much pestering persuading by myself and surely others, she has expanded her stock. 

So, what is it?


Rollups!!

What do I mean? Well I mean the cutest rollups for crayons or pencils or markers that you could imagine.  I know from personal experience.  I ordered a few, both boy and girl versions, of the crayon ones and liked them so much that I started nagging politely requesting her for the marker or pencil versions and for bigger/older kids.
  And now they’ve got ’em!

They really are very cute, and well made.  They have cute fabrics for girls and cute (read boyish, cars etc) fabrics for boys.  They stay closed well with a nice springy band/button latch and they DO stay secure.  They are perfect for backpacks and cars and travel.  I’m thinking spring and summer travel coming up: a great option for those hard to corral pencils and crayons and pens.  Fun, clever and well made.  Now I know  you can get these here and there online or now and then in one of the stores, but honestly, these are by far the nicest I’ve seen and they are for a great cause: bringing home a particular little girl who is waiting in Bulgaria for the process to clear. 

So it’s money for a good family, and a good cause, and you get a useful cool tool.  It might even be add a bit of sunshine to the winter blahs……What’s not to love?

I’m going to go order more for big kids now.  Go, check it out and tell Adrienne I sent you and said hello!

>Fish Eaters – What’s up with that?

>Ok, so here we are in Lent, officially in the first week of Lent (because even though half of last week was Lent, beginning with Ash Wednesday, those days aren’t counted in the “weeks” but they are counted in the days.  Yeah, it messes me up too.)  Anyhow….. so we’ve already had two official days of abstinence and one of fasting.  

So, what’s the diff? Abstinence, fasting, no meat….but fish, isn’t fish meat?  
Confused?
Join the club, you aren’t the only one.
In fact, I am a what they call a “Cradle Catholic;” by which I mean, raised Catholic from birth.  And even I still have to scratch my head and think hard on the specifics of the days sometimes.  {Although, admittedly, lately that’s been more because of the softening of my mind and loss of brain cells due to this blasted middle age.}  

But folks always ask about the fish.  Specifically, “What’s up with the Friday Fish?”

Ya got your fish fries, your fish sandwiches, tuna fish in every way you can dream it up.
Personally, I prefer the veggie route…but that’s just me maybe.  Anthony, my little man, he will vote for the cheese pizza, every time.  But I digress.

Anyhow, so what IS up with the whole “fish” thing?
Well lots.
The rudimentary part is we abstain, we Catholics, from meat on Fridays.
It’s a small mortification.
Some have speculated on why we do it.
But as with most things in the Church, there is always real history and tradition behind what we do today.  For a good article on the history and reasoning behind this, go here, it’s an article written by my real world in person I just hugged her at Mass yesterday morning gal pal, Sonja.  She’s brilliant and writes lovely intellectual pieces that explain so much about the church (as opposed to my stream of consciousness blather).  So read, you’ll learn.  You’ll be glad you did.

So, we fast and abstain in order to experience the spirit of this penitential season of Lent.  We make small (measly, really) sacrifices in order to train our bodily selves to look beyond our lives here, moment to moment.  We offer that small suffering to Christ, in thanksgiving for all he went through for us.  It is a small teeny tiny parallel to Christ’s forty days of prayer in the desert.  We are in the desert, during Lent. We try to train our minds, bodies and hearts to turn to what is actually real and important.  And it’s not the hamburgers…or the fish sandwiches.

So, yeah, we don’t eat meat on Fridays.  Mostly during Lent, though some try to observe this throughout the year.  And it may sound like no big deal.  But I’ll tell ya, maybe it’s because I have the self discipline of a four year old….but when I KNOW I can’t have meat, all of a sudden I am craving a big ol’ steak, or bacon, or a chicken sandwich. It’s as if I was thrown back to the caveman era, before the world knew the  wonders of spinach salad with goat cheese, or hummus, or a good caprese salad.  And I sulk a bit.  I mope around and suddenly can’t find anything to eat. Because I am an infant.  And so, Fridays are tough.  But I guess that it how they are supposed to be.

>Song on a Sunday: The Marti Song

>Because I still miss him, although I’m very happy he’s having such a great time in Rome.

And because we were watching this yesterday and realized that this is now, in our  minds, “The Marti Song”…..because this is the song that we used for the court pass.  So, this is an old version, Chris was younger, still in high school (the school talent show, kooky fun)…..but still makes us all smile.  So I think it’s perfect for this Sunday.

>…Her Station Keeping….

>It’s Friday.
It’s Lent.
It’s the First Friday of Lent.

So. You know what that means:
Fish sandwiches.

Ok, it means more than that.  It also means Stations of the Cross.

This is a prayer that I am particularly fond of.
It speaks to me.
It combines my interest in art with my love of story.
I mean, as an art major in college and a folkore and lit major in grad school, what brings those two together better than the Stations of the Cross?? Well, in my not nearly humble enough opinion, nothing!

Every Catholic church has a set of the stations. And while I tend toward the more classical in my aesthetic, I always like to check them out.  They are a visual story. An artistic storyboard…with all due respect.  An illustrated art/prayer event.  Sometimes antiquated, sometimes profound, sometimes dreary, sometimes modern or abstract. Sometimes they are even 3D.  But, they are classic and installed in all churches, typically lining the perimeter interior walls.

Right, sorry, what are they: The Stations of the Cross, Via Crucis, Via Dolorosa?  The Stations are a visual depiction of Christ’s Passion, from his prayer in the garden of Gethsemane to his entombment.  They are a stationary, historical, art event….Mel did his own version in his famous difficult graphic hard intense sometimes controversial movie.

But they are also a prayer.  Preferably, a communal prayer.  And during Lent, most churches will have a communal time to come together to pray the Stations on Friday’s (right after the fish fry, no kidding).  And the people gather in the evening and take the small hand sized books and follow the priest or prayer leader as a group.  They walk from Station to Station, set around the church.  And they pray together.  And in doing so, they are meditating on Christ’s passion and what Lent is all about.  Because it’s not only about the swearing off of chocolate or, um, swearing or drinking or whatever.  Lent is about the person.  Not us the person…. And the gift given, and hopefully turning our hearts back to the giver.

And in praying the Stations, even a small child, or I, can wander the aisles, gaze up, and follow this story.  And wonder.  And even in doing that, begin to pray.

We adore you O Christ and we praise you….
Because by your Holy Cross you have redeemed the world.

>"Remember You Are Dust…."

>

“…And to dust you shall return.”

No.  We don’t wipe them off.  
They are a mark, all day long, today:
We are not our own.

Thanks be to God.

>Mardi Gras!

>

It’s Fat Tuesday! Mardi Gras! 
Carnivale! Shrove Tuesday!
Yup, it’s the last day of Ordinary Time, the day before Ash Wednesday.  So, today is the feast, the fest, the fete…the party.  I love the folklore and history of today, the tradition of pancakes for supper – to use up the fats and dairy stuff in the house before the ascetic season of Lent.  Now, that “using it up before it goes bad” isn’t a factor so much, but I love the tradition anyhow.  
Today I am stewing about finalizing my Lenten efforts.  This article is a good one, with a good reminder and perspective…but it has thrown my ideas on their head a bit and now I am rethinking.  It’s very easy for me to give up too much of or the ‘wrong’ food items.  It’s so ingrained for me to give up some foodstuff that I feel like a cheat if I don’t somehow.  And  yet, I have food issues (Because I have arrested development and am like a 4 year old if told I can’t have something……infantile, I know.)  due to my lack of discipline, the effects of said infantile issues on my children (Yes, cranky much? And, yes, again, my failing, I realize that, thank you very much), and being diabetic my body just whacks out easily somehow it seems.  So…not sure if I will do food at all again this year or focus more on this issue, also a struggle.  
Yeah, I think that the bulk of my Lenten consideration needs to be centered around prayer and silence.  I’ve been crazy distracted lately in prayer, and well, I’m  never very good at silence.  I crave it, but even when I find it, I can’t seem to get my whirling dervish of a mind to slow down and shut up.  Really.  So, to that end, I think I need to work on that.  Shush up and listen for pete’s sake.  Please.
I will type more tomorrow about this whole Lent thing, and my personal Lent thing (because I know that’s keeping you up at night….).  But for today, I once again refer you to the marvelous supersite of all things Lent: questions, resources, history, ideas: Aggie Catholics
So, tomorrow: Into the Desert, Lent begins.
Today: 
Laissez les bon temps rouler!

>Song on a Sunday

>Because I miss him.

That’s my boy: Buddybug.  Ok, Chris, in the middle on the keyboard.   Playing the last time of the semester with his friends Katie Buetow (cello performance major), and Daniel Tostado (former vocal performance major) at Legends, up at college.  And gosh, a sad song: a cover of Ben Fold’s “Fred Jones.”I know I’m just the mom, but I think they sound good…and it’s nice to hear him sing and play.  
Note: I’m not techno-literate enough to get it the video sized right and keep Katie from being cut off.  So if  you’d like to see her play (and she is terrific, I love watching her play…ah a cello…) then go here to see it full size and full resolution.  And yes, Chris does need a shave!

>Lent-O-Rama

>I can say that, can’t I??
That’s not too frivolous, is it?

I mean, this is a somber season….but it’s still in front of us and it’s almost Mardi Gras folks….so I’m running with it. Carnivale, Fat Tuesday, Shrove Tuesday, Mardi Gras. It’s all about the feast and the fest, you know – the pancakes – until Wednesday that is.

Because Wednesday is Ash Wednesday and its’ the beginning of Lent. And as I’m feeling it starting to press toward me, I am riffling through my lenten resources and ideas, prodding friends and family for their thoughts and ideas and being a general pest.

So, because I’m stewing about this, I’m posting. And if you want to shortcut this post and go to the mother of all lent round ups, go here, to Aggie Catholics and their yearly “one stop shop” for all things lent. You can also go here, to Sister Mary Martha, for her usual clear eyed, cut to the chase info on lent; what it is and shouldn’t be. Worth a peek, there.

Now I always like to plan on some spiritual reading during lent. No kidding, I do. Now, that plan often gets derailed, but really, I try, I do. TO that end, my list from last year, bookwise, still stands, go see…lots of good ones there.

Now, if I had to pick one or two…..and I might…I would recommend you look at these. The first one is a big bite to chew, um, read. It is dense and one of those books where you have to put it down every few pages to, um, digest it all. But, oh so worth the time:

Fire Within by Thomas Dubay : One of the best books I’ve read, especially for Lent. Deep, challenging, powerful stuff. One of the ones at the top of my list of great books, for years and years.
The second top of the chart lenten good reads is below. I’ve given this book out a number of times and it’s just a good retreat in a book, and great for retrackign your conception of the term “love.”

I Believe in Love, : Great book, a mini retreat in a book. Very powerful. Simple but very good. Don’t be put off by the simple title, it is still full of deep richness to dive into, especially this time of year. Because lent is exactly that, a time to declare our love…for others, and Christ (Not ourselves, like we/I usually do).
Ok, that’s it for the moment. I also have thoughts about things to add to your/my lenten observance, the really rich part of lent, in my book: confession, stations of the cross, devotions…

I actually really like lent and this whole season – even as I kind of brace for it. It’s a bit like setting out to train for a marathon or a half: you know it’s gonna be oh so difficult and probably painful, but you also know that you will be glad for the training, discipline and strength that results.

Hmmm. I am still pondering and pestering everyone quite a bit about that whole fasting part of lent, but if you all have any ideas or thoughts on it all, I would love to hear them. and when I can steal another few moments I will try to post some good links on it all. Great stuff out there on fasting, prayer, all the richness of the Lenten season. But until then I’m asking around about folks Lenten observances.

And now I am stepping it up to the cyber pest level. So, are you observing lent? If so, how?

>M is for Mountain

>

flikr photo by raspberryfairy
We are kind of being buried by an avalanche of letters here.
Or, maybe it’s just me.
Stumbling over a landslide of large letter boulders and formations…
Climbing across acronyms and peering through words, condensed into letters, that somehow take on a whole ‘nother life in their meanings and connotations.
No, we are not just learning our letters, “A, B, C.”
Though we are learning our letters, on that level, with multiple kiddos….and that is a lovely thing.
We are learning all new letter sets, and these letter combos have, or take on, a life of their own.
In some ways, and some instances, these letter sets and acronyms are very helpful, insightful even.
And in some ways, they redirect in the wrong way.
They are purported as helpful but in fact they direct your attention away from what is important and off to that ever so enticing realm of speculation and worry and discrimination and stigma.
I know, this is so vague. In a way it has to be, due to all that discrimination and misinformation and stigma. But it just sets me afire to think about all that and any of it lobbed at my kids. So I get a little protective (and then get all bent out of shape that I even HAVE to be). Because really, these are NOT in ANY WAY qualitative words and letter sets. They may well be descriptive, especially if you take the time to look at the objective definitions of the terms. But then again, they sometimes are a catch all…and are not all that precise after all.
I know, at this point you’re thinking, “Just what the heck are you talking about?” But then again, I suspect some of you might be nodding your heads, you know exactly what I’m talking about because you are living it too. You know some of these fun combos: ADD ADHD BP SPED LD DSLX ODD MR ID CD SZD ED IEP IQ MDD ESL ELL …buried yet? Blinded by the letters? Maybe you want to shout out loud sometimes too? Maybe you want to know that you’re not scrambling across all these letters, through these rocky hills, alone.
Well, that’s what I want to know.
Anyone out there?
Because if I just keep this all tight, close in, then I go into the indigo blues and I feel like a big faker of a mom in the know.  And yes, that does make it all about me, and that’s wrong on so many levels. But it’s right on the one level that I know: this forum. I think I can trust this blog and the folks I know who see it. This blog has connected me with amazing wonderful folks, moms, people.
And I think it can again. . People who can let me know that they know some of those letters, with their child. And they have been there, done that. I have been there, done that, with many many of those letter sets. But there are new ones too. And those are the ones that it would be nice to compare notes about, maybe.
We moms, we tend to unite, to get behind and give a tug or a shove or a nudge when needed. We brainstorm and compare ideas on what worked and what didn’t. And as I’ve gone through the many years of raising kids, that assistance has been invaluable (if a little late, ahem, Jean). So, as I am once again wandering a new road – left turn – I know better now. I know to reach out and shout to see if anyone else is here.
I’m all ears.
And I always read that you shouldn’t cross the mountains alone, take a buddy.
And these acronym mountains, how to cross through them as a parent, with school and life in general?
I think I need a sherpa.

>Almost Wordless Wednesday

>

Cravings….

Yup, it’s February. And it’s cold.

>Getting sucked into American Idol

>Yeah, I’m procrastinating from getting a jump on my Monday morning…I know, I know. 

OK, I normally really don’t watch American Idol.  I admit, I have been known to veg out with television after some long days: House, Amazing Race, Biggest Loser.  I can get sucked in.  But American Idol, while a favorite with my girls, is something that I find almost painful to watch, at least in the beginning of the season when they are doing first cuts.  It’s hard for me to watch the really really bad performances; I feel SO bad for the contestant as they are performing and then as they stand there being shredded by the judges.  It’s almost a physical “ow” watching.  So I don’t.

But my Chris tipped me off about this girl.  Said I would be interested in her and she was good and I would want to see how she did.  He was right.  See for yourself.  I love this and will root for her; not only a family I can get behind, but her head and heart are in the right place and she has a great voice.  And she picked a great song.  I hope she goes far. 

>And Now We Are Six. Happy Bday Little Man!

>

Happy Happy Birthday my Little Man!
You are six years old today!

And, this year your birthday lands on Superbowl Sunday! How cool is that?
You get all the birthday fun and all the Superbowl fun and football and football food, all together.
Sounds almost like a birthday wish come true.

Oh my boy….
You’ve been waiting, impatiently, for your sixth birthday.
Jumping and hopping with excitement just thinking about it.
I think you know it’s going to be an especially good sort of year.

When you are six,
you get to do cartwheels in the hallways,
and talk after bedtime with  your brother
and have jumping contests off the stairs
until your mom hollers at you to stop.
You have car races in the foyer,
and wrestling matches in the study,
practice roaring like a dinosaur with your brother,
and pester your big sisters until you all get in trouble.

Outside is for snowballs
and sleds
and bikes
and worms
and cannonballs
and skateboards
and finding the perfect stick.

You love to run fast,
jump high,
shout loud,
laugh hard,
and flop down on the ground to catch  your breath,
before you jump up to chase your brother again.

You love to eat.
Most anything.
But especially, pizza and cheeseburgers,
pancakes and eggs,
french fries and grilled cheese,
pasta and chicken fingers,
cookies,
and more cookies,
most anything, really…
as long as it doesn’t have peanut butter in it.
Because peanuts and peanut butter are just gross.

You don’t like chores, but you know how to do them when you set your mind to it.
You don’t like homework, but you love school.
You think Miss Thompson is the “greatest kindergarden teacher in the universe.”
I think she is too.
You like to try out new words like “spectacular” and “ridiculous.”
You wonder if I can make you an eye doctor appointment, so you can get yourself “some laser eyes.”
You don’t like thunder or bad dreams, but like being able to snuggle back to sleep.
You don’t like bedtime, but do like singing “Hail Holy Queen” with mom every night.
And you say, “We sound good.”
I think so too.

Oh my six year old son.
I love you so.
We all love you so much and can’t imagine this family without your big happy grin and loud bouncing running joking you.
You are happy and cuddly and smart and full of life and full of love.

Exuberant.
Being six is kind of magic and especially wonderful.
There was a special writer named A.A. Milne.
He said it best, about being six:

Now We Are Six – 

When I was one, I had just begun, 
When I was two, I was nearly new, 
When I was three, I was hardly me, 
When I was four, I was not much more, 
When I was five, I was just alive, 
but now I am six, 
I’m as clever as clever, 
So I think I’ll be six now and forever. 

Author A.A. Milne

Happy Happy Birthday Little Man!
We are so glad you are six!

>Saturday Roundup

>So….I have all these little bits and pieces rolling around my brain. Making me all distracted..or, erm, more distracted than usual. So, in order to get something done and move forward, I’m kind of downloading them into a roundup post.
It’s Saturday, chore day, time for tidying up.
Today, I’m tidying my brain.
Fair warning.

Let’s see (in no particular order of importance):

Just talked w/ Chris. He’s safe and sound in Rome, he’s ensconced in his dorm and happy as a clam. Jet-lagged excited happy and hungry. Four course dinner tonight to welcome them after Mass. Ah, what a life!

The group in Haiti who was detained for taking the kids across the border…? Makes me nuts. I don’t pretend to know what they were doing, or if it was criminal or not. But, IMHO, it was simply, if nothing else, stupid and damaging. Possibly criminally stupid. It was not only, at best, good intentions run amok, but it appears that it was deceptive. And that is always wrong. Setting aside the trauma of these kids, families, parents in this event, if you can, (and I know, you can’t, but I told you my mind is all over the map lately)…it is the worst of the ugly American. At best, it was thoughtless and arrogant.

And that gets me riled. That somehow, taking these kids to live across the border in an orphanage, and possibly adopted out of their home country, is better than keeping them with their families and in their home country? Really? NO. Yes, the hardships before and even more so now after this quake were and are overwhelming. But those kids have parents, families and a village and a culture and HOME….and that trumps all. That is what is best for them, not a removal of that, swayed by nudging and promises made in desperate times. And further, this just continues to give international adoption a bad name. It adds to the misinformation and misunderstanding of orphaned and relinquished and abandoned kids…to the whole system and process and complex nature of adoption in general, and internationally in particular. And that, the broader scope of what these folks have unwittingly accomplished here, just kind of ticks me off. Ok, sorry, rant over.

Next, still working on school fine tuning, especially with Marta. And realizing that being an advocate for your kids is never done. I mean, I knew it…..but sometimes you kind of think, “Ok, whew, done for now. Hoorah.” Well, no. Especially with regard to special needs, and school stuff….its a marathon, an ultra-marathon…and I’m strapping on my shoes for the long haul. Because, well, it’s gonna be a long haul. But then again, I guess that’s being a mom. That’s the job description in one way or another.

Special needs stuff is a huge jungle to hack through. I mean, just when you figure out one tiny part of the map, or how to read that map and begin to make sense of it…well, then you have to start reading a whole new one. And it’s very hard to parse out. And the road ahead…well, it’s hard to see. I guess that’s where we are supposed to work on one day at a time. Living in the moment, and all that. I’m really bad at that, good thing I have so much opportunity to practice. Ha!

Been thinking about the blog a bit. I think I have been using a double standard and I think I might change it up. By which I mean, I use nicknames for most of the kids…..(and did for Tom and I before all the Marta Visa/TB stuff hit the fan) but never have with Gabey or Marta. Well, that’s not entirely fair, is it? So, do I add nicknames to Gabey and Marta? Hmm, that bell has already been rung. Or do I go for equity and just start using the rest of the kids given names? At least sometimes. Stewing on this. What do you think?

Last: Lent approaches. I have much pondering to do about that again. I want to think about fasting and get that all sorted out before Ash Wednesday….Stewing about what I will do for this lent, how to have a spiritually productive season.…surely there will be posts about it all. And it seems unrelated but its not (at least to my jumbly mind): I was wondering if anyone knew a reasonably priced way to reproduce original artwork…..paper mixed media into a print form and downsized considerably. I have a series on the Stations of the Cross that I was thinking about making into a manageable form, like printed together on one sheet or a few….but not sure how to do it without spending a fortune. Ideas?

OK, I’ve swept my brain clean for a moment or two. Now to do the same to my house. And find some more coffee to jump start those sleepy synapses again.